Q. I am forgetting what I was going to do, where I put my glasses.  Should I see a doctor about my memory loss?

A. As we age we become forgetful but this is normal.  What is not normal is when we begin repeating information and then repeat it again within an hour.  When we forget where we put our car keys, what individual keys are for, and the way to get somewhere familiar.  When we lose awareness of time and our medications.  When we forget that we ate an hour ago. When we turn on the stove and forget to turn it off. These are signs we should see a doctor.

Q.  I think my parent needs more help than we can give, but her sister talks to her on the phone and accuses me of being in a hurry to “lock her up.”  Who is right?

A.  The first step to take is a visit to a Doctor who specializes in gerontology.  Write down incidents you have witnessed and express your concerns clearly.  Aging is a natural process and you should not feel guilty because you are concerned.  Early stages of dementia come and go.  Her sister may want your parent to be “just fine” because she herself is experiencing loss of which she is unaware.

Q.  My father writes notes and tapes them all over his house, but I notice he either ignores them or asks me what they mean.  What is happening?

A.  Compensation is a normal behavior each of us learn to do, i.e., we wear eye glasses when we experience vision loss.  Your father is no longer able to benefit from his previously effective note strategy.  He needs more assistance for his daily living.

Q.  With my Mom’s increasing memory loss there seems to be less reason for celebration.

A.  She may not remember that you came yesterday, but each visit assures her of your love today.  Bring picture albums, souvenirs of her travels, work, family and friends.  Keep your conversation positive and centered on her.  Consider purchasing a guest book in which you can date each visit.

     At Adagio we deliberately cultivate a family environment and celebrate your parent’s life.  We welcome your family into ours.